Blog 16

11/11/10 12:00pm

Hey how are you? What’s your name? what do you have to work on?

‘Young student maybe in her twenties (African American)

Tutor is older non traiditional student, older htn 40 caucasian.

Girl said it was analysis,

J mentions thesis statement

Girl reads her paper outline

J says so yo’re saying that is yoru thesis statement.

She smiles and J asks the question, what dos th e theshsis statement sound like

Girl answer.

She is holdering her pen in her hand with two hands. She looks down and slightly slouches. THer eis a space between them. A chair can fit in the middle. J has her pen tracing along the paper while she reas and the girl hwolds the pen in her right hand.

J leans forward but the paepr is facing ht the student.

Jasks so how do you thin this sthesis statement helps the body praragraph and how it will expelian it.

J and student tllooks at each other. J says the thesis statement helsp you and me and the audience understand what the paper is focusing on.You are analyzing and showing me in essay for. So the thesis statement is people make advertisements……(J reads it and says so that is yoru thesis siatement.

Girl points to it.

J says so it is what you are focusing on in the paper. Youre telling me tha t(…………….) J reads the main idea. J says so what do you think the main focus…uhmm in the introduction what you want to say is that you’re kind of viewing this as.. magazine’s billboards and uhm this is kind of like art. It has to be creative so it grabs our attention. What you want to tell me is what you’re going to prove to me about this whole picture. So grab a pen. You’re grying to grab attention and what else do you wnatw to do.

Girl answers questions that J has and J validates it by saying so you did a lil prepwriting here..and J points to it. And she brings the paper towards her.

J says okay so you will say panasaonic is one of the main leading products in the worl.d What else do you want to tell me.

Both of them are reading with their pens. J Girl reads with her hand on her head. J then leans forward.

J tell me what you want to tell me. I’m the main audience. Write down briefly what you think I’m seeing and what you want to tell the audience cuz I don’t’ know.

Sot the girl starts to write she has one hand on the table and the other hand writing with the pen.

12:08

J looks at a picture while reading.

Girl still has her angkle crossed. J has her feet resting underneath her chair but on top of the wheels.

After girl writes J reads it and sais that is good, what else do you want to tell me about it.

Student keeps writing and reads….

J what else do you want to tell me?

Student has a very soft voice and J speaks kind of loud but not yelling just directly and not as soft as thte student.

On thing to keep note is that they are both sitting eye level of each other. And at this point the paper is directly in front of the student not J at all. J said don’t’ worry about pucntaiton or grammar. We are freewriting, tell me everything really quickly .

Student: (can’t reall hear what she is saying) .

As they talk about the paper, J says okay what else. J twrisl the pen in her hand. The girl says, something about what ht apepr is showing her. J leans foraward when girl ahs something to say. J says okay what dos that mean. Girl talks and J says why don’t you write that donw. It is important. J says okay how ti’s big, it must be expeinsive. J says okay so you want to tell me that. .

J says okayw aht is this, ti’s bgger than my house. Do I have room for this tv Do I have to move out? How do I Do it? Okay..so you want to tell me…

I’m sure you want to tell me. It has lots of wires and someone who knows how to do it as well.

12:13 J says hold on, let me get something.

J picks up a paper about how to do an analysis paper. J says I will describe what is going on and how everything fits with everything else…..

H then explains what the assignment sheet says, she reads it outloud. She points to it, both the paper and th assigmment sheet. J relates it to schools and museums.

J says, okay we have to say something about that right? Let’s talk about how that will happen right? It means millions of people will see it ? What will they do with that information? Even if it is not for a small person and honey why don’t we get this tv right? You want to tell me stuff like that. You want to assume.

J tries to explain what the analysis paper is and wha tti’s about. She reads it. The analysis paper is closer to J. the student reads along. J reads while tracing the lines with her pen.

They still make eye contact with each other and the girl talks very softly. J says what a better way to say this?

J said instead of saying “ in order to” you can say, “the best way to” what?

The girl leans forward and write son her paper. It is in the middle. It is not entirely in front of the girl.

J reassures the student and sakss her to read sentences. J then says uhmm and he holds her chin.

12:27

J leans forward and traces sentences with pen. She reads outloud . The girl taouches her mouth with her pen . She then follows where J is trachign her pen. She then holds her pen towards her mouth.

J asks the student t a question and she is quiety, she nods her head and she reads her paper silently she points to the paper with her pen. Both of them point towards the paper. J doesn’t write on the paper, she just points tow here the student has to read. J asks what hwas next. J says what she likes. She says oh wait she wants examples here.

J reads out loud again and the girl write son her paper. J then reads outloud atagn. Whil e J reads the girl moves he pen towards her mouth. J then continues to read again and says “instead of saying, you can say “Panasonic is doing the same thing’. J says right. The girl holds her pen towards her mouth when she is not writing and then J is reading outloud again sentence by sentences and says good. J then crosses something out for the student. She then reads the paepr outloud and the student is quiet.

J says’ I don’t know if you need to put this sentence right here or if you should put it later on. The girls says “well” and I think she reads tries to explain her paper.

And J backs off and continues to another section. J asks the student questions aobut her paper .

While J questions the student she uses hand gestures. Hse also has a coffee or stuarbucks drink on the table. In the center there is one person at the front desk . A student and tutor in the other hexagon table and I am seated near the table by the window while a tutor is at the computer.

12:34 at this point. J stretches her arms open to empahseize what she is saying. The girl is leanring towards the opposite side of the tutor. The tutor learns forward. The girl has her hand on her chiln. She points to her paper with a pen and asks qustiosn. J asnerwrs the question and syays “no” I like this. What else can we say about why they did it” . H leans over to turn the page in the girl’ notebook. The girl then points iwht her pen. J reachers forwards. Student the writes.

J emaphasizes the word “globa” by making the shape of a circle with her arms. J says we’re tyring to say th at we are grabbing attention, what else, one more point. J says okay what about the size of the tv. You’re talking about the first statement, what will you say? In terms of grabbing the whole statement…..

J says why will this grab attention in the middle of the musesam? Is it art?

The girl then nodes her had and says yeah.

J says they are changing the way the people are viewing life in general. J leans roward and reads the girls statement. J asks questions to guide her. The gilr is quiet. She is thinking or it appears she may be confused? Not sure. She is very quiet. Tutor is talking a lot more. Tutor asks questions to get the girl to talk a little more.

Once the girl talks, J says “great, write that down”.

J then says “okay now what else?’ “and then…” “is it something about the future?”.

J says you want to get more creative in your statement. You have to explain to me what you are talking about and how can we say it.

Looks like the gap between them got slglty bigger. The gir has her head on her hand. She holds her pen in the other hand.

12:42 J moves the paper towards the middle and the girl has her hand on her cell phone which is in her sheatshirt pocket. J moves the paper towards the girl but her hand is on it. The girl doesn’t’ have her hand on her paper. She looks down and is quiet as J reads. J says “it’s not color of tv., it’s the picture. What do we call it? High D?

Girl says Hi Def?

J Let’s fix that sentences so it includes …

Now the girl has her hand on her face.

J traces the paper while the girl reads.

The entire time J has her pen treacing the lines of the paper while th e student reads outloud. J may use this to follow along.

When the girl gets to the end of the paper.

J says what does that have to do with the paper?

Student says it has to give an illustration.

J says Okay good.

J says okay that sentence should say in which to view the picture not see the picture.

So J appeared to correct her.

12:50

J said okay you can say in the early days there was no such thing as colored pictures. You can say how far technology is coming…

At this point, student has her hand on her aper and the other hand on the pen.

J says wait hold up. You’re not going to say tv you want to take it out. Okay, there is another way to say this. No, as time when one, what happened? Tv got more???

Right exactly. Yo udon’t want to say evolved immensely…

J says No..over the last…

J says okay so you’re saying……

As J leans forward, the girl leans further away from her. And she let’s J read with the pen.

The girl then reaches forward to right but she appears to pull her hand back again.

J then says good goog good that’s good. Don’t say immensely you can say tremendously. It doesn’t fit to talk about technology. What’s next?

J says okay that is a great line. So here you’re talking about 1920 and here you’re talking about 2010.

J let th gilr read.As the girl read she had her hand on her head.

Then J stops her. We know it’s amazing

J pulled out her pda and had the girl look at the thesaurus. J sais, another word for amazing is striking or….

And the girl read over. The PDA was in J’s hands.

J said “ you don’t start a word with going’..

J says “what do we do..how do we get through…”

Girl provides answer

J Yeah that’s a good answer. ..

J so you said we’re moving . So what’s the word? Transition

Girl make sa comment and the J says, yeah you could reiterate what you said before. That’s good.

12:57 so the girl reads her paper with her hand on her head. She reads outloud but J is tracing the paper with her hand.

Girl: can I just say other person?

J says uhuh

Girl continue sot read her work out loud. She is reading everything. J nods and says right.

Then J stops her and says “why would you assume that?”

J says well there is a lot of ar tin the museum but it’s unknown and I don’t see famous artists in her but that is kind of not…it’s a good sentence but yo have to word it a little better….. Art by many different artists.

Oh sorry ok that’s about all the time we have. So you know what to do? The girl says, this is the same paragraph?

Why is it attracting the most attention? Because it is high def. this is the third you’re saying?

This one for this one.

In the conclusion you need to restate your thesis in the end of it so what you’ve seen..etc…

Student : can I put this ??

J: uh huh, exactly, as long as you haven’t said exactly…the same thing, you’re good.

Ran out of time for session.